Off-Topic Forum

I'm putting this in off-topic simply because it only relates to trading, but isn't an offer to trade.

I had a little situation recently and I will NOT name names on this one (and I hope the other party does not reveal themselves either) as this is not meant to harm their reputation amongst others. The reason for this is to gauge what your reaction to this would be.

A member offered me a card for nothing. Simply, out of the kindness of their heart, wanted to send me something from my want list that they had. Obviously, I accepted. I checked over their want list and noticed a pair of recently added 1991 cards that I had, so I dropped them in a PWE to this member. PIF for PIF.

This member marks package as sent on 6/11. This member receives said PWE PIF and thanks me and asks me if I received mine yet. I hadn't. That was on 6/16.

I did receive the PWE PIF finally on 6/23. The envelope had a post mark of 6/19 on it - 3 days after this member asked me if I had received it yet, 8 days after it was initially marked as shipped.

I detailed all of this in a private message to the member and asked for an explanation.

I received 2 trade requests from the member, both of which I declined (politely). After the second was declined, I received a message asking why. I asked for a response to my private message which had, up to that point, been ignored.

The member, after this exchange, finally responded (with an apology) that they had indeed asked if I had received the PWE knowing that they hadn't sent it yet.

My question to you - If you were in my position, would you deal with this person again if they approached you? Thanks.

(I have indicated to them that I do not wish to have any further transactions with them.)

I've had one a couple years ago where the member clicked on "packge sent" but didn't send it for at least 2 weeks, claiming financial issues. The cards did finally arrive and have since traded with them again. My biggest quip, which I mentioned to that person, was to not click on send until it is no longer in your posession. I understand things can happen, but really?

I've dealt with that on ebay where someone marked a package as shipped then didn't send it until a week later, sometimes more. It's frustrating and awful customer service, but if I still get what I requested, I can't be completely upset. Would I deal with that person again? Probably not, or if I did, it wouldn't be for anything more than a few dollars.

No, I wouldn't. I have been a believer of second chances on here, but the one thing I'd like to see is forthrightness; admit the mistake from the get-go. We all know communication is key and when asked a directly, non-hostile, question and get a response like that isn't acceptable to me. That, and the initial avoiding of the question, indictaes something deeper. The person may have had all the right intentions in all the other dealing, but a lie will get you every time.

I had something similar happen, but the member honestly thought they sent it....even asking me if I had received it yet......they found it on their desk :)   

As always....communication with these things!!!  The member in my transaction still stayed up to date, so everything was smooth.....Lack of communication on the other party's end in Dan's trade is what caused the issue.  

I liken this to back in the day trading around the dining room table or sitting on your bed with the Star Wars sheets.....if you don't speak up in a trade, you aren't going to have a good experience!   (old guy voice) Back in my day of trading.....we had 7 or 8 of us with binders shuffling cards back and forth so fast that if you didn't pay attention, you lost out!  I have in my possession now, a 75 MVP card with Roger Maris' autograph on it.....I think that passed through all of my buddies hands at least 2 or 3 times back in the day!!

For me personally... there's a difference between getting backed up/making a mistake vs. being deceptive.

If someone makes a mistake, doesn't have a card, gets behind, whatever and is just honest and tries to make it right, I'll work with them again.

If someone tries to be deceptive for whatever reason.... confidence is lost.

One of the things I was running into up here in Canada was. I would put in mail on say a Monday but they didn't go thru till say Fri or Sat then It is marked wrong. What was happening is with Covid they were only sending out once a week. Then someone in the sorting station was positive so some places got shut down for couple of weeks. What a mess, and I still think there s a bunch in a truck somewhere as new trades take days to a week but some older ones still trickle in. as long as you communicate as much as possible everything should stay good. Jeff

I understand mistakes can happen but when there is no response to queries or observations such as what Dan observed or simply a query on the poor condition of a card that was sent (not vintage but 1990s), then I won't trade with the individual again.  I had it happen once before and declined the next trade the member put forward to me as getting crappy early 1990s cards without being advised beforehand is not on.  I also recently had a member ignore my query about whether his package had ever been sent as it was over 7 weeks since he had shipped it and int he meantime, I had received several post-dated well after his supposed shipping date.  I will no longer accept trades from him even though we have traded numerous times.  In both these situations, I no longer trust the individuals to resolve any possible issues.

For me I would say     YES    

1.  It was a PIF 

2.  More then one people has offered me cards for my address and never delivered   I hate to e-mail them and ask where are my cards.

3.  I would love to know if everyone I have sent a PIF to.   if they have received it.  Only 25% of cards sent out has been posted a thank you here on the PIF thread.

4.  Wondering if anyone have sent me a PIF and I never received it???  I always thank people on the site.

5.  Over the years I have missed laid PWE for a few days.  Which I would have bet the cards were send. (I'm not a betting man)  I may have told them it was send.

Just a couple notes on what the first couple responses glossed over - card was sent, I did receive it, it was in fine shape.

Member knowing asked me if I received it without having sent it out, did not attempt to contact me to let me know it went out.

In fact, we had many messages in the transaction back and forth. a V: in front of the text means I wrote it, OP: means other party. You'll have to read from the bottom up - sorry, copy/paste, not editing:

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V: (this was 6/23) In today's mail. Yay! (Still didn't get the other item from ebay.)

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V: Sent: Tue, 6/23/2020 12:27 PM This might ease you mind, I have an ebay order that is also rather overdue (by a week or so). Hopefully, they both show up soon.

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OP: Sent: Mon, 6/22/2020 2:01 PM Toploader I don't have much card savers

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V: Sent: Mon, 6/22/2020 1:37 PM Not doubting you, nor really worried about it. Just keeping you informed. Did you use a top loader in the PWE? Or did you use a card saver (like I did) in the PWE? Top loaders can get caught in the equipment. This could have happened here. When it arrives, I'll be sure to let you know.

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OP: Sent: Mon, 6/22/2020 1:26 PM :o :o I swear I sent it Dan :( :(

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V: Sent: Mon, 6/22/2020 1:12 PM 6/22/2020 - Still nothing.

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OP: Sent: Tue, 6/16/2020 8:49 PM I had a NICE pile of mail waiting for me today my box was FULL to the brim lol

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V: Sent: Tue, 6/16/2020 8:46 PM Not yet, but I didn't get to the PO today. I'll go tomorrow. Glad you got them. :)

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OP: Sent: Tue, 6/16/2020 8:17 PM I got the cards thanks Dan did you ever get this yet ?????

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End of messages

So, as you can see, there was actually plenty of communication, plenty of opportunity there to say "Hey, sorry, it went out on x day", nothing. Especially on that 6/22 message "swearing" that they sent it. Yes, they had by that point, but that's where they could have said, sorry, it wasn't on the 11th like I marked, but the 19th. I finally got this earlier today:

Yes ... and I am deeply sorry for asking you if you got it when it wasn't sent out

A day, 2 days, even marking as shipped on Friday and not getting in the mail until Mon or Tues would have been fine. This was a Thursday to the following Friday, with the "did you get it yet" in bewteen. It's the outright deception here "Did you get it?" whn they knew it hadn't been sent. Thanks to all for your responses. I hope this member has not done this with others and has no other issues. Again, this is not meant to damage them or call them out. I simply wanted to know how you would handle this member moving forward if you were in my position here.